My life is to make everything around me beautiful.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

My Thoughts on Feminism

This is also another post I posted over a year ago but thought I'd repost it since it is important in today's world. And I thought I'd throw in a bit of eye candy for ya little chickees!

I've been busy today doing housewifey things like vacuuming, swiffering, dishes and mopping. I know some people look at them as chores, but I truly love taking care of my home. And my hubby. I appreciate him. I apprciate all men. I'm not a fan of feminism. I believe men and women were put on this earth for a purpose. Man takes care of his woman and woman takes care of her man. Plain and simple. It took me a very long time to come to this realization, but it in fact works quite well. Of course, there are "special circumstances", but by and large it works well - especially when everyone doesn't see themselves as the "exception!" I've heard it all from "but no one understands my situation" to "oh, they weren't talking about me." Not true. We sometimes have to rationalize our choices. Working outside homes tears families apart. Period. Stay-at-home moms are to be revered because so many don't do it any more because society looks down on them. Well, I'm here to tell you that this woman doesn't! Motherhood is denigrated to the point that society makes them uncomfortable saying that they are housewives or stay-at-home moms. NOT ME! I've been on both sides and I can absolutely unequivocally can tell you staying at home is so much better. I love it.

Several months ago I was at the beauty shop waiting for my turn to get my hair cut. The hair dresser asked me if I was in a hurry since I was scheduled for a 12 noon appointment. I said no. (It just turned out that noon was the best time for me.) She said that since it was a lunch time appointment that she had thought that maybe I was doing it on my lunch hour. I looked at her and though to myself, "Does she really think I'd go to work looking like this?!" Hah. After I said no, I said I'm a stay-at-home wife, mother and grandmother. A man sitting there waiting for his turn laughed. I'm not sure if he was "FOR" me or "laughing AT me"! Whatever......I didn't take offense at all. I find humor in the strangest places - and almost daily!!

Keep up the good work, moms who stay at home!! :-) Oh, and I had a woman many years ago ask me if I dyed my hair. I looked at her and said, "If I was going to color my hair, do you honestly think I'd dye it THIS color?!" We both laughed. I guess that was a compliment to the natural color of my hair? No, it ain't nothing special, kiddo!!


  1. Hey there Connie you are so right about being a stay at home mom these days! it is a hard job..whether you are a mom or not...I keep the house inside and out..and its work...but I do enjoy taking care of my home, hubby etc.....take care Chicka! :)

  2. You right - staying at home is so much better, especially for kids.
    Beautiful post for thoughts.

    Peace and blessings!

  3. Hello Connie, thanks for stopping by and checking out the kitchen redo!

    I too, have been on both sides of the fence...worked in a career (I was single for many many moons) and I have also stayed home. I have to say I did better in my career than I do at home...but I do enjoy both. Staying at home has been a great experience...I've been able to start my own website...and work on my antique biz. I will be staying home a lot more very very soon due to some new "changes" coming up. Stay tuned...



  4. So glad you posted this again. I was able to stay home and home school. So long ago and worth it.

  5. Yeah! Score one for the real Feminism Movement!

    Thanks, I needed that. Doing housewiffy things today since my hubby thinks I've been neglecting it for a week! Ha, like he even has a clue...


  6. Hey Connie! I love this post honey! It was meant for my ears to here. I totally agree with you. Every word of what you said. I know what you mean about women who stay home being looked down on for staying home and taking care of the hubby, house and kids. I have been on both sides of the fence like you have. I stayed home with my children when they were babies, toddlers, and then when they got in Kindergarten I went to work doing hair for a couple of I have been on both sides of that fence and staying at home is much better for me. I know it may not be for everyone...but it works for us. I appreciate it more than I ever did before. I really regret some things about those years back when I was staying at home with my little ones. For one, I regret feeling bad about myself when people would look down on me and ask me if that's all I did. At that time in my life I was in my early 20's and I let it get to me and let it bring down my self worth and I was alot of times scared to say what I did when people would ask me. Little did they know that I worked my butt off with my baby, changing diapers, cleaning, cooking. It wasn't easy, and I felt like everyone else worked. I had no support system. Just my sweet husband. He knew how hard I worked and how beat I was when he'd walk in the door. The stay at home mom's of today are so lucky that they have the internet. I wish I had been able to have that back then. Just to know someone understood would have been wonderful. Ya know. Well, these days and for years now, I don't feel bad about staying at home and taking care of the house, hubby and the kids. It feels wonderful especially after having been out in the work world. I feel priveleged to stay home and I am more than happy to say that I don't work when people ask me. I hold my head up. After having been in the work world....I love staying at home and I am not ashamed anymore of having stayed home with my children and took care of hubby and home. It works for us. I sacrificed having some of the finer things in life by staying at home, but I do not regret it at all. We would have probably had more if I had worked, but we have never done without and we are comfortable and we are happy and that's what matters most. I've been with hubby for 24 years now and been married to him for 17 years, almost 18. Our boys are in 12th and 6th grade this year and I still am not ashamed to say that I stay at home. So what if they are at school. LOL! I am still always here and they know I am and I am taking care of things...dinners always on the table and they know it. I think it makes them feel good. I wish my mama could have stayed home with me. I was alone alot as I child and it would have been so nice to have her there, but I understand that it wasn't possible. I guess that's why I have always wanted to stay home with my kids, probably because I remember to well what it felt like getting off of the bus to an empty home. I take pride in what I do....I only wish I would have known what I know now all those years ago....when my babies were babies! LOL! I would have enjoyed it more. Thanks for the wonderful encouraging post. Stop by my blog sometimes when you can. Have a great day!

  7. I will never regret the years that I quit traveling with the band, only to visit home, husband and children, to actually be a stay at home homeschooling mom. (As a new Christian that was my first plan of action, to get off the road.) I do regret the years on stage, away from my family and I quit while two were in grade school and one a toddler. Every moment away is a moment gone forever. And they are all grown now...I can't get that time back. I WANT that time BACK!!!
    Moms...if you can, stay at home. Then you won't have to regret it.
    Blessings and Hugs,

  8. Hey Connie girl,
    Just checking to see what you are up to. Inspiring women to take care of their men no less.
    That is exactly what we should be doing!
    Good post.
    Take care

  9. connie! You are a awesome chick! these are my thoughts exactly! I love staying home and being a homemaker and a mama! I feather my nest everyday and LOVE IT! I don't want to work ! The kids benefit so much from mama being home, they are so less likely to get in trouble, the statistics speak for themselves!!!! xoxo
    I feel like decorating today!!
    And not only that I am going to homeschool my kids too! They can't recieve a better education anywhere else!They don't even teach home economics anymore in school, how rediculous !

  10. Yep! I agree 100%. And I say that as I'm wearing my new vintage apron =) Blessings... Polly

  11. Amen Connie!! Thank you for a great post!! I'm a stay at home mom and I thank God every day that I can be. I too enjoy taking care of hubs, kids and the home!

    And speaking of which...the kitchen timer is going off - time to go take out the cupcakes!


  12. I am with you Connie!

    The only time I am a 'Feminist' is in the case of equality. Before marriage DH and made the choice for me to stay at home. I would only go to work to put food on the table and keep a roof over our heads. Not a Beamer in the garage or to live in a MacMansion. We are happy. I do make a few $$ on the side and I call it my own. We have everything that we need and we are happy.

    What I mean by equality is when a woman has to work, if she has the same job, qualifications,etc she should be paid the excact same as the male coworker next to her with the exception of job performance and time with company. And that could go either way. :-)

  13. Hi Connie,
    Thanks for stopping by. I also feel that being a wife, mom, daughter, sister, Grandma are all very special and important jobs that God has given to me to do the best that I can.:) and Auntie and freind...
    Warmly, Deb

  14. Well said Connie, with a little dose of your humour as always:) Rachaelxo

  15. Well, I was a single mother, so I didn't have a choice, but I would have loved to have stayed home with him. They grow so fast and then are gone on their own. It is such a short precious time and meant to be cherished. I agree, marriage is a partnership and you should spoil your spouse. :)

  16. I honestly have never heard a single person say a word that indicates they "look down" on stay-at-home-moms.

    I think the idea that SAHM's are criticized is a myth. A similar myth that is out there is that working moms can't be good moms.

    Let's face it - all parents "WORK". Whether they do it out of the home or in the home; whether they do it for pay or not - those are insignificant. Every adult member of a family contributes to the well-being of the family.

    People choose the lifestyle that works best for them and their families. Let's stop taking on the mantle of supposed victimhood, and just acknowledge that families need a variety of solutions to life's problems. Individual families make their own decisions to adapt their own talents to the most important things - raising our children and supporting our families - according to our best abilities.

  17. I just have to chime in here. I spent many years feeling guilty for not working outside of my home when my children were small. And if my circumstances had been different I actually should have helped with finances. (I was such a suzy-homemaker that I hate household chores & cleaning now!)Doing without important things for lack of $ is not exactly a good thing either. I started my own business from home when the kids were teens, & I'm glad I was around for them. My kids are all grown, & I have a precious grandchild. I have more choice about how I spend my time now. I respect all family choices about what's best for THEM. I totally agree with the comment from g.


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