What Disease Is This????

The strangest thing has happened! Has anyone else experienced this?

You have a problem using knives in someone else's kitchen because you can't even cut YOURSELF with them and you're definitely a "cutter"!

You can't find any dishes clean or for that matter, any dishes at all!

Since you have no experience with the tv because you don't watch it at all, you cannot get the one in the motel room to function and you're too embarrased to ask them as you had to have help getting in the room with the card the day AFTER you used it once. Apparently I'm viewing "unusable signal or you don't have a card to view this" as something I should be watching, hmmmmm????

You feel like you car is your 2nd home running to pick up hubby at the convention center so he doesn't get picked up as a "homeless" person or get mugged in the seedy part of Riverside. Why do they hold conventions in places like that???!!!

You yearn to sleep in a different bed - YOUR OWN.

You look at the fridge and wonder where you're going to put all the "stuff" to go in there. Plus there is stuff in there you're sure came over with the pilgrims or at least 5 generations back!

You go out for milk, come home and it's "not the right kind"!!! HUH????

You want your pillow badly and feel like you're sleeping vertical with the motel one.

You believe you'll pop anyone who is below the age of 10.

You've eaten food you have no idea what it's composed of.

The dogs bark and look at your leg as though it could be tonight's dinner.

Your hands are prune-y from washing dishes from about 15 different meals during the day.

You wonder what you were thinking when 47 years ago you wanted "children"!

You've watched commercials from the most intimate things and personal hygiene(!) to weiners needing psychoanalysis.

You can't find the remote because the kids have hidden it because you tell them you cannot abide one more episode of cartoon network, Wylie Coyote or Spongebob what's his name!

You have no desire for pizza because you've seen it on the tv so many times as you've passed the tv that you wanna wretch.

You would KILL for your HOME internet!!!

You make strawberries and shortcake for kids and look inside the fridge, find 2 cans of whipped cream (full!!!) and neither one shoots out a thing......much less whipped cream........sob......sob.......sob........

You have enough food in the fridge for the entire U.S. Marine Corps at Camp Pendleton (which is somewhere around 40,000 husky good looking marines- hooooah!) but no one sees anything in there they want to eat unless there are chocolate chips in it so your son runs to Del Taco for nachoooooos. Sigh..........

The relatives visiting from overseas have crammed in 3 shopping trips in one day. I've never even done that one!

Salad isn't in anyone's vocabulary. Say whaaaaa, Nana?!?!

Has anyone ever ever heard of using a glass a 2nd time?!?!?! Nuuuuuuuuuuu, apparently not!

You take them to a local pool and the kids behind us have the mouths of the hardened criminals at San Quentin and that's the ones 6-8; the teenage sister had barely enough to cover her mammary things on her boobs and earrings in her lips and you're truly glad your hubby isn't around to see her or hear the language!

Daughter in law has run away from home! Ooooh, please come back for me!!!!